Untitled Eighteen 6.2010

Just let me know,

Things will be alright.

Just let me go,

I don't want to fight.

Untitled Seventeen 7.11.2010

I look into your eyes,

Hoping to feel the way I had once before.

I remember the lies,

And now I flinch, remembering the sore.

Could we put the past aside,

And try to figure out who we are?

I can't imagine you've died inside,

Has it already taken you that far?

I remember when it started,

We were so young and niave.

I remember when we parted,

As if we had set out to deceive.

Untitled Sixteen 7.11.2010

So when I shut my eyes this time,

I expect that once they open,

You'll be gone and not come back,

You can't break my heart again,

I wouldn't dare to stand for it.

Not again.

Untitled Fifteen 5.2010

The tears I cry when I'm afraid,

They couldn't cry loud enough.

And my mind is getting far too frayed,

Filled with useless pointless stuff.

Untitled Fourteen 2.27.2010

I see you standing off to the side,

No smile on your face.

I know the pain you hold inside,

Can't get away from this place.

Break at the sight of pain,

It's what you do.

Tears fall down like rain,

Does no one love you?

Forget this temporary cycle,

This thing we all call life.

Just let your heart go,

Give it all to God.

Untitled Thirteen 7.22.2009

What pays for today won't pay for tomorrow.

Because what pays for today is gone with my sorrow.

Broken and empty I'll set out to find You.

Because broken and empty, nothing else will do.

Yesterday is as new as a photograph.

We've all been there and had our laugh.

Yesterday us as new as a telephone.

We talk but we're still alone.

I paid for yesterday with bloodied wrists,

So now today only starts with unwanted twists.

I paid for yesterday with the tears I cry.

So I hop that today I get another try.

Tomorrow holds a future I will never see.

And the person in the mirror just isn't me.

Tomorrow holds a future I will not know.

Because tomorrow holds a time I can not go.

Yesterday is the pain I can't forget,

Tomorrow is the goal that's never met.

But today is what I have.

Today is what I have left.

Untitled Twelve 7.13.2009

We're all pretending this is sanity,

All of us in humanity.

But I'm the one that you will not see.

'Cause I'm afraid to be,

Me.

Maybe if I could fit your face to the photograph,

Or match your voice to the sound I hear,

Maybe then I could know you,

Maybe then I could feel,

Found.

'Cause we're pretending this is sanity,

Every one if us in humanity.

But we're the ones that you will not see.

'Cause we're afraid to be,

Real.

This is my plea for humanity,

What you let pass isn't sanity,

You're hurting every single one of us,

As you're saying,

It's good for us.

Untitled Eleven

So many times I tried to stop.

But pain persists.

Pushing me to give it more.

To help it get further.

Until the last hope does drop.

So pain persists to kill me.

But death I wish not.

Attempt to take my life so quiet.

To steal it while I sleep.

Yet I'm unaware and do not see.

Untitled Ten 4.1.2009

Tears I cry;

I cry in hate.

This horrible pain;

My horrible fate.

Crying should only last a second.

To be broken with by laughs.

Untitled Nine 11.26.2008

Smiling faces that sit at a table.

All fathered 'round to celebrate today.

So this world's made us able.

To make Thanksgiving a selfish holiday.

"So I'm thankful for myself,

I guess my family too.

And I'm thankful for my wealth,

But that's nothing new."

That's the chant we hear,

Thanksgiving day.

So what's there left to fear,

If we live in this selfish way?

"I'm thankful for my mommy,

I'm thankful for my daddy,

I'm thankful that I'm free,

I'm thankful for the wonders that I see.

"I'm thankful for the teachers,

I'm thankful for the preachers,

I'm thankful for my friends,

And I'm thankful the sadness ends.

"I'm thankful for the love,

I'm thankful, still, to be,

most of all I'm thankful,

For the God who created me."

So think before you speak,

What are you thankful for?

Are you thankful for yourself,

Or are you thankful for more?

Untitled Eight 10.20.2008

I can only try to get though,

Every day You lead me to.

Doing things Your way,

I can only wait and pray.

Can't take time away from Love,

Or Love away from time.

Even if you're left to cope,

To write a Love is to rhyme.

Getting through this empty day,

And doing so in Your own way.

Only leads to pain,

Like thunder leads to rain.

Untitled Seven 10.7.2008

Everyday I'm with You, You make me feel.

Like this love I got is oh so real.

I'm going in and I'm diving deep.

Everyday I'm with You, I soar and I leap.

I'm not afraid to try for first, when Ya hold me.

Hold my hand and I'll be free.

I'm going in and running out.

I'm not afraid to scream and shout.

Everyday I'm with You, You make me feel.

Like all the hurt I have, can only heal.

I'm going in and falling fast.

Everyday I'm with You, I know this love will last.

I'm not afraid to know Your name,

Hold my hand and I'll play Your game.

I'm going in and I'll never cry,

I'm not afraid to give and try.

Untitled Six 9.29.2008

I can't be alone forever.

I can't tell you how I feel.

I'm too afraid I'll shatter.

Too afraid of how I'll deal.

Too afraid my heart might break,

Too afraid of what may,

Or may not be real.

Untitled Five 9.28.2008

Every time I think of you,

My hear goes faster than before.

Every time I see your name,

My heart grows a little more.

I need to know your love,

To hold your hand right now.

I need to hug you long,

To hold you hand somehow.

You'd mean the world to me,

But I don't like this place,

You'd mean a million dollars,

But that'd be just a trace.

I'm just missing you,

Thinking of how sweet you are.

Wishing I could see you,

But I know you're just too far.

I need to see your face,

I need to hear your voice,

I need to know you love me,

I need to have a choice.

You'd mean the world to me,

But you're worth so much more.

Every time I think of you,

I feel like never before.

I'm not afraid to love you,

Just afraid you won't,

I'm not afraid to need you,

Just afraid you don't.

I'll always love you,

My heart is yours forever.

You mean so much,

I'd want to lose you; never.

Untitled Four 9.14.2008

I'm not the one to give hope up,

But seems this time I was first.

Yeah, no one saw it coming,

No one thought I would.

Maybe that's why,

Yeah, I think that's why it's easy.

No one thought I could,

No one thought that'd be me.

So which is worse?

I'll feel alone inside,

Yeah, on the say you hide.

So when's the day,

When's the hour you leave me to die?

I know it's coming,

Yeah, I always knew.

Like I trusted you,

Then double checked,

Hiding around a quiet corner,

To make sure you didn't lie.

Yeah, you always lied,

You were killing my on the inside.

You thought I' never see the gun,

Never see the knife you hid.

Oh, what you did,

Oh what I've done.

Yeah, I'd found your knife,

But I got my own,

Yeah, I watch your life,

You hurt, I hurt,

We both feel like dirt.

We'll both die young.

Yeah, you'll go by shot,

I'll go by slow.

Or maybe I'll just hurt.

You'll hold the gun,

Some one else the blade,

The ropes, water, chains,

It's not my fault - my pains,

Ad yours don't have to be.

Yeah, you could be free.

Yeah you really could.

Untitled Three 5.2008

To wait to feel your arms,

Seems too far away,

From what they all say,

Life is supposed to be,

But is that risking extra harms,

To be someone who is not me?

Untitled Two 5.12.2008

So you sit to watch me,

The time and place,

Which I'd used to hurt,

Both physically and my emotions,

Though they'd not a trace,

I'd feel like dirt,

You did not see,

My so called comfortations.

But now that you know,

I've only stopped there,

So now I'd rather draw,

Than to make a slit,

Rather write of care,

Than of what you saw,

Even though it'd never show,

It still hurts a little bit.

I'd hurt today,

But you would only care tomorrow,

After all my pain and blood is gone,

And I'd lie dead on the floor,

Because of all my bitter sorrow,

I'd wait 'til coming dawn,

But I'd of died before you say,

The words of love forever more.

Untitled One

So you say that you know me,

But I never even met you.

You tell me that you love me,

But I'm the one you never knew.